Etiquette for the modern male

Again another interesting conversation between my wife and I. You must think that I'm weird, but in fact, I'm a doode and want to stay like that.

I make no claim that I know everything when it comes to etiquette, but there are a few things that I am quite certain of. For example, when you go to a movie with another doode and there are plenty of seats around, when you go to sit down,  you leave a seat between the two of you. I don't know what it is, but I do believe that it ingrained into the male mind since birth. My wife thinks us guys are silly as the female species doesn't behave this way. They are more than happy to sit next to each other, okay fine by me, but I want my one seat distance.

Another prime example. When you walk into the bathroom at work and a co-worker is at the urinal, do you walk up and take the one right next to him? No. The unsaid rule is that you leave one urinal between the two of you. Ideal conditions would be that there are a total of 3 urinals on the wall. If there are only two, go find one of the stalls.

While I'm on the mind set of the urinal, I want to take this time to remind my fellow man. When I'm at the urinal relieving myself, please don't strike up a conversation. I am in no position to respond, I have priorities to take care of. I'm not trying to be rude, I'll be more than happy to converse once you wash your hands.